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December 8, 2005
Visit with Santa
Yesterday I took my girls to the local mall for their first ever visit with Santa Claus.
I thought it was going to be a fun, enjoyable experience, but it was anything but.
First, many of the other parents began squawking and complaining to me for reasons unknown to me. Something about being "dressed inappropriately" or something else to that effect. I guess because it was unseasonably warm that day and I decided to take my shirt off. I guess it is considered against the law now. It's still America, isn't it?
That wasn't the real problem. The real problem was when I realized that the Guv'na had passed out (again) underneath Santa's bench and ruined our photo. You can see me in the picture trying to alert the staff that Guv'na was plainly visible under the bench and would someone please get him out from under there.
After The Guv'na was awakened, I asked him what he was doing there in the first place. He said he had wanted to get down there early and be first in line for his kids when the mall opened, and he guessed he had gotten drowsy and had fallen asleep. Needless to say, Guv'na was escorted off the premises by security and his kids never got to see ole' St. Nick. Also, I was asked not to come back next year.
Posted by Phil at December 8, 2005 9:41 AM
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Comments
Last time I passed out under Santa's bench, I woke up to find myself naked, inbetween two midget elves, one hand grasping a half pack of Camel filterless, the other, an empty bottle of Tanqueray. I never got to see Santa either.
Posted by: Sethro at December 8, 2005 9:52 AM
Phil: You have GOT to stop posting corrupted pictures of those little angels. :::WHACK UP SIDE YOUR HAID::
Posted by: Washington Cube at December 8, 2005 10:27 AM
It does get warm in a crowd Phil.
Posted by: Bon at December 8, 2005 10:53 AM
YES! The Playaz Angelz make another appearance!!
Tell us - how did you get the one back from the jaws of the shark??
Posted by: Kathryn at December 8, 2005 11:32 AM
What was the Guvna planning to ask Santa for??
Posted by: DC_Cookie at December 8, 2005 1:42 PM
I want to move to Georgia.
Posted by: A_Unique_Alias at December 8, 2005 2:43 PM
Santa looks like he attended the same party the Guvna did.
Posted by: Rhinestone Cowgirl at December 8, 2005 4:21 PM
Now that is HOT. Rowr!
Posted by: dcsportschick at December 8, 2005 5:14 PM
Apparently Santa's pill habit is not as bad as Guvna's.
Posted by: Bon at December 8, 2005 7:43 PM
I ask for the same thing every year: Three cans of Barbasol and a twin sized bed made of marzipan.
Posted by: Guvna at December 8, 2005 8:00 PM
Another example of the liberals attack on CHRISTmas...
Posted by: Jett Loe at December 9, 2005 7:00 AM
How is it (I'm assuming Santa) a LIBERAL attack on CHRISTmas?
Sigh.
Posted by: AsianMistress at December 9, 2005 10:35 AM
I interpreted Jett's statement to mean that the liberals are all "put your shirt on!" and "get that drunk out of here!" type of attitudes towards Christmas.
Posted by: Phil at December 9, 2005 4:12 PM
Ooh, Phil. Your skin is almost as white as Santa's hair. Santa needed shades, I'm sure.
Posted by: Siryn at December 9, 2005 9:03 PM
...but oh Siryn does he get bronze in the Summer time.
Posted by: Bon at December 9, 2005 10:12 PM
looks like you and santa are using the same ogilvy perm set.
Posted by: VP of Dior at December 11, 2005 10:27 PM