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June 8, 2006
Land of opportunity
Back in 1983, speeding across the Chihuanhuan desert, Tac dodged gunfire and smashed through cactii carrying precious cargo towards the United States' border. That cargo consisted of Ray Reyes, Roy Rosello, Robby Rosa, Charlie Masso, and Ricky Martin, better known as "Menudo".
Yes, we were responsible for bringing you the hit songs Fuego, and Rubik, The Amazing Cube.
And while we appreciated the music, frankly we were more interested in how much cocaine could be smuggled inside the rectums of Menudo.
Now, the U.S. wants to keep immigrants out by strengthening the defense along our borders. So who, then, will smuggle across the next Menudo?
We will.
In fact, it has already happened. While you sleep, the Playaz are at work. A windowless van with five new, young Latinos, packed with comet dust, races towards the border, where they are left at a "drop house" (and an ensuing mix-up causes them to be held for ransom until their families paid for their freedom, ultimately ending in one of the boys having a hand severed), then on to sign a contract with the Playaz' recording label.
So stay tuned, America. You can build your fences along the border, but you will never keep out the music (or the drug smuggling capabilities) of Menudo.
Posted by Phil at June 8, 2006 8:50 AM
Comments
So you guys beat Michael Flatley back to Ireland, but you bring in Menudo. Forgive me, but I do not understand this logic.
Does Michael Flatley refuse to smuggle? Is that it?
Posted by: Steve Skalish at June 8, 2006 11:30 AM
We hold a general disdain for Michael Flatley.
But yes, the drug smuggling is a large part of it.
Posted by: Phil at June 8, 2006 1:00 PM
You should hold a GREAT disdain for Michael Flatley... he is, after all, the most hated man in Ireland (true fact). I applaud the Playaz sophisticated taste.
Posted by: WOA at June 8, 2006 2:49 PM
Sweet Lady of Guadalupe.
Frankly Phil, I'm not keen on doing comet dust that's been stored for long periods in someone's ass. But that's my personal preference. :P
Posted by: Saidah at June 8, 2006 3:03 PM
Not even Ricky Martin?
Posted by: Phil at June 8, 2006 3:05 PM
The smell goes away after freebasing it.
Posted by: Wayne at June 8, 2006 10:35 PM
I mean, it's in a balloon - it's not floating around freely in there.
Posted by: Phil at June 8, 2006 10:42 PM
Here's a twist, why not smuggle the coke in their menudo and call the new band rectum? Just switch the organs... although technically Menudo isn't a body part... just a yummy treat on a hot summer afternoon!
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