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February 8, 2007
Playaz may be partially to blame for astronaut Nowak's break-down
OK.
We almost never admit wrong doing, but we may have some culpability regarding Ms. Nowak's Love-Triangle-Meltdown.
Granted, we are still trying to sort through the details. We are hearing different names being tossed around in the media, but I think we, the Playaz, know that our involvement very well may have something to do with Ms. Nowak loading her car with latex gloves, rubber tubing, a mallet, garbage bags, and then strapping on a diaper for the 900 mile drive before her.
It all started innocently enough. First there were the flirtatious glances, as the Playaz and Nowak floated past each other in zero-gravity.
Suddenly, Chewbacca has floated in for a little heavy petting.
And before we know it, we are engaged in an all-out space orgy.
It was not right, I'll admit. NASA's psychological testing showed Ms. Nowak could not handle a full-scale Playaz' love making session in outer space.
I have for you a diagram of the Playaz Sex Pyramid, which shows you the different levels of arousal a woman might experience when involved with the Playaz. Level I is the "experimental" level, typically involving Dian Parkinson and Chewbacca. Level IV, the "Kenny" level, is the point of no return.
Nowak, in her attempts to rise through the pyramid to Level IV, ultimately snapped, and soiled herself as she drove through the night at the thought of Kenny and the Playaz with any other women.
For that, we are sorry.
But for our seductive ways, I make no apologies.
Posted by Phil at February 8, 2007 1:20 PM
Comments
In my love pyramid, Wayne always comes out on top.
Posted by: Dian Parkinson at February 8, 2007 1:47 PM
And then he cries, of course.
Posted by: Guvna at February 8, 2007 2:28 PM
Somehow, when I heard this story on the news, I just KNEW that the playaz were involved.
Posted by: sparkles anon! at February 8, 2007 2:29 PM
We should be more careful. It is common knowledge that heavy petting from a wookie can easily drive a woman up the playaz sexual pyramid
Posted by: Bon at February 9, 2007 8:33 AM
And we all know how Chewy gets aroused in a weightless environment.
Posted by: Phil at February 9, 2007 9:32 AM
900 miles wearing a space diaper, the wig, the trenchcoat, I mean come on, we all knew the Playaz were behind it......but I want to know what did you say or do to Miss Anna Nichole?
Posted by: Brianf at February 9, 2007 10:05 AM
Maybe it's just me, but I would have thought Dian Parkinson to be higher up in the pyramid.
Posted by: Rev Smokin Steve at February 9, 2007 4:28 PM
The pyramid is strictly from the woman's perspective, Steve. Thus, Level I - The "experimental" stage, consists of Dian and a wookie.
Brian - the Playaz simply called her home.
Posted by: Phil at February 9, 2007 7:04 PM
I'm no Dian, but I love to stroke wookies :-)
Posted by: Jama at February 11, 2007 12:16 AM
Jama, perhaps you have followed an errant Google link?
Posted by: Guvna at February 12, 2007 10:39 AM
No, I believe she's in the right place, Guv'na.
Posted by: Phil at February 12, 2007 10:53 AM
Then God Bless!
Posted by: Guvna at February 12, 2007 2:11 PM
I love your cynical wit!~*
Posted by: Debbie at February 12, 2007 6:55 PM
The pyramid is Pythagorean in its perfection.
You guys, the astronaut in diaper is old news. What about Anna Nicole Smith?? I don't wish to speak ill of the dead, but ... c'mon. You owe your audience an explanation. Give it up, boys.
Posted by: Reya Mellicker at February 12, 2007 10:05 PM
Ah ha! Now I understand what the rubber tubing was for... snorting comet dust!
Posted by: DC_Cookie at February 14, 2007 7:18 PM
Chewbacca could use a good kiss.
Posted by: Han Solo at February 18, 2007 9:18 PM
I can arrange that.
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