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August 3, 2007
Free Base/Meth Lab/Pyrotechnic mishap ignites Phil on fire first night of Playaz Ball
Hair and body covered in acetone, drano, and other flammable liquids and with the air heavy with noxious fumes from the Playaz active methamphetamine lab, while free-basing comet dust during the Playaz annual fireworks display, Phil caught on fire for the first day of Playaz Ball.
Rushed to the hospital, Phil was treated for his severe burns and insisted on being released shortly thereafter to resume activities ongoing at Playaz Ball.
"Tomorrow night is 'Huff Night', and I'm certainly not going to miss that," Phil was quoted as saying.
The Playaz are concerned that the burns will also ignite Phil's addictive nature, causing him to spiral into excessive plastic surgery. "We're afraid Phil will over-do it. He was talking about bleaching his skin following his treatment. I mean, it's like he wants to be really white or something," Guv'na commented.
Meanwhile, Wayne remains missing from Playaz Ball. Wayne was sent on a diplomatic mission to negotiate with Mr. Sheriff prior to departure to PB, while also trying to secure Mr. Sheriff's salary to help pay for Playaz Ball. Wayne did not return, and the Playaz left for their headquarters on Wednesday.
"Playaz Ball waits for no one," the Playaz said.
Posted by Phil at August 3, 2007 9:48 AM
Comments
I'll be praying for Phil's speedy recovery. And since I'm a Catholic, my prayers actually mean something to the guy upstairs.
Posted by: homeimprovmentninja at August 3, 2007 10:28 AM
Don't pray for Phil, pray for Wayne. Mr. Sheriff is not a man to be trifled with or taken lightly. It's entirely possible that in addition to being a Grand Master of Business, Mr. Sheriff is also a Grand Master of Kung-Fu.
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