Obtained exclusively by Playaz Ball!

The Playaz seen here in quarantine following Playaz Ball 2006, will once again seal themselves in the capsule until the unknown virus killing celebrities has passed

This "Celebrity Flu", as the Playaz have dubbed it, has taken the lives of Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett, and Michael Jackson. It was also reported that Jeff Goldblum believed he had caught the celebrity flu and cast himself off a cliff in New Zealand to avoid the horrible symptoms prior to death.

Origins of the Celebrity Flu remain unknown to the Playaz, although Bon suggests it may come from geese.

The Playaz will remain quarantined unti the Celebrity Flu passes.

Wanting to "get a taste of Playaz Ball", the governor drove down to Atlanta to meet the Playaz because he needed to "blow off some steam" following a recent legislative session in South Carolina. The Playaz recommended the Governor not notify his family of such a trip.

The Playaz suggested they fly on their private jet to a place "even more f---ed up than Tijuana" and wound up in various Buenos Aires night clubs and raves.

Sanford, seen here doing "the robot" at a rave with the Playaz in Buenos Aires

The Governor reportedly reported having a "terrific 3 days" of mind-altering drugs, anonymous sex with multiple women, and a tetanus and penicillin shot before returning home several days later.

Never before seen footage from Playaz Ball 2007, the Playaz become aroused after stumbling across 70s & 80s porn actress Seka's website. Unbeknownst to each other, the Playaz leave multiple seductive phone messages to Seka (inspired by their mentors in the art of the seductive voice mail, Kenny Rogers and Pat O'Brien).

The advertisement is a bit hard to read in this limited space, so here are a few excerpts:

• Craftsmen commissioned specifically for this project by America Remembers decorate each working Colt .45 pistol in sparkling 24 karat gold artwork with blackened painted highlights. In magnificent detail, this handsome tribute pistol honors the man, the music, and the legend that is Conway Twitty.
• Left side features a pair of detailed portraits from two very different times in Conway's career. The portrait on the left shows the singer-songwriter at the peak of his career. The portrait on the right shows the young musician in his U.S. Army uniform and strumming his guitar. All artwork is featured in sparkling 24-karat gold.
• Right side features three portraits of Conway. The image on the far left shows the singer in a relaxed pose studying the grounds of his beloved Twitty City. The center portrait shows a classic pose of Conway. On the right is a portrait of Conway in his early days. Between the portraits is Twitty's signature plated in 24-karat gold.....

Order yours today, so next time you can say "Goodbye, Darlin'" before putting the classiest bullet you'll ever shoot into your worst enemy.

In the background, you hear Tac's disapproval.

In addition to a show that features traditional local heroes such as Kenny Rogers and Burt Reynolds and favorite tunes such as Elvis Presley's "American Trilogy", Lee Greenwood's "God Bless the USA", and Pink's "Get the Party Started" (click link for sample), the show will now pay special tribute to the Playaz. Highlights will include the Playaz' space travel, renditions of their epic gun battles with local authorities, as well as special effects-laden erotic escapades depicted by state-of-the-art lasers!

Patrons are encouraged to enjoy a night under the stars at Stone Mountain while they are dazzled by the Playaz lasershow that will titillate the senses. Adults are encouraged to restrict lovemaking resulting from viewing the show to their own blanket per Park Safety regulations.

Little did Cookie know, the "The Gambler" never pays out. For inside the housing is the Guv'na, collecting all the coins that used to be baby Jack's college tuition.

The Playaz' jet seen leaving Barcelona, Spain

The study was conducted after it was noted that immediately after the Playaz' departure from the Spain that their Gross Domestic Product instantly rose 500%, and that the city's inhabitants began working extremely hard, some for up to 48 hours consecutively without sleep or rest. Government officials were baffled, and after ordering a series of tests, scientists discovered that "up to 5 drugs" were laced among the air particles hovering around the city that must have been left behind by the Playaz, including cocaine and comet dust.

Scientists further noted that the Playaz themselves carry around this "cloud" of drugs, similar to the character "Pig Pen" in the Peanuts comic strip.

Reports stated that after the Playaz left, citizens of the towns the Playaz visited became "model thin", and never felt better in their entire lives.

"Damn!" said the official photographer, as he noticed the infamous Gulfstream jet emblazoned with Kenny Rogers' image on the tail had swooped into the upper left corner of the shot. "How did they get in there?!"

Unfortunately, the shot could not be re-taken due to the overwhelming cost and widespread panic the White House had already created by staging the photo-op.

Never having heard of "photo shop", the White House stated they had no way of "erasing" the Playaz jet, and decided it would have to stay in the photo for future publications.

The Playaz, cruising high over Manhattan, noticed the photo about to be taken, sped up to where the presidential jet was flying, and were able to get themselves in the shot at the very last moment.

Since Barack Obama has been elected President, a lonely and wistful Michelle could often be seen staring longingly from the south portico. That is, until a large figure of a man later identified as The Champ would mysteriously appear from the Rose Garden - whisking the First Lady into the recesses of the White House and into various bed chambers were they would make love hours on end.

Prior to this development, Mrs. Obama would repeatedly sigh to reporters that her husband was "so busy" and "never has time for me" during many of her appearances around Washington D.C. Now, Mrs. Obama appears to have a certain glow about her ever since Holmes' appearances.

Holmes himself has stated that he is now the man in her life. He has publicly described to the press his rendezvous with the First Lady at a nearby Red Lobster, where he hand feeds her cheese biscuits and popcorn shrimp, then afterwards he "bangs her gently" in the Lincoln bedroom until the morning light. Holmes has also presented Mrs. Obama with an oil painting capturing their steamy love for each other.

Oil painting of Larry Holmes and the First Lady

It is believed that President Obama is not unaware of these developments. He first became involved in a confrontation with Holmes at a press conference several months ago. Holmes and Obama began to spar verbally over the President's failure to purchase the recently designed "Holmes Defense System", at which point Holmes turned his attentions to a visibly detatched Michelle.

"Hey woman!....hey woman!" Holmes shouted at the First Lady. "Listen here. Since your old man ain't got no heart, maybe you'd like to see a real man. I bet you stay up late every night dreamin' you had a real man, don't ya? I'll tell you what. Bring your pretty little self over to my apartment tonight, and I'll show you a real man."

An enraged President shouted back at Holmes and had to be restrained by Secret Service, but it was noted that a flustered Michelle was taken in by Holmes machismo.

Holmes says he is now the head of the Obama household, where he teaches the Obama girls about life from his auto biography.

Since then, Holmes has introduced himself as the new father to the Obama children, with little resistance from the President himself. Michelle Obama has not commented publicly on her affair with the boxing champion, but it is believed Larry has a "stimulus package" that compares to no man according to her friends, and that she is quite satisfied.

It has caused me to travel back in time to blogs past....check this one out.....this post made me realize something...that we are still better than the rest of you.

...Better than the rest of yooouuu...